With three teenagers in the house, I hear a lot of music.  Most of the time, I can’t make out the lyrics (which is probably for the best), but when I was chauffeuring my daughter on her paper route one afternoon, a song by the artist Pink caught my ear.  Maybe it was because I could understand the lyrics, but I think it was because those lyrics struck a chord in my heart.  I bet they will in yours, too:

Pretty, pretty please

Don’t you ever, ever feel

Like you’re less than,

Less than perfect.

Pretty, pretty please,

If you ever, ever feel

Like you’re nothing,

You are perfect to me.

(F*&%$n’ Perfect, Pink)

The song lyrics (and title) actually have an expletive in them, which was censored for radio and for this blog.   Rather than dismiss the song because of its strong language, I prefer to think the expletive usage expresses how passionately we desire to be recognized as special and unique.

My husband and I have had three children together, and we have marveled at how different their looks and their personalities are.  Two of them have brown hair; one has blond.  One loves to read, but the other two hate it.  Two of them are social butterflies, and the other often prefers to stay home.  If we, as parents, feel such joy at discovering the specialness of our own children, why would the Triune God feel any differently about relating to and watching his children express their unique personalities?

Acknowledgement and acceptance of our individual personalities is one of the most basic human desires.  I’d like to assert that the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit actually do that, and not in a patronizing way.  The Triune God doesn’t just tolerate us; they truly like us.  They delight in our uniqueness, in our individual beauty, even our quirks.  Ephesians 1:3-6 tells us that long before we were ever born, the Triune God planned to adopt us through Jesus Christ:

“Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love.  Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ.  (What pleasure he took in planning this!)  He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son” (The Message, Eph. 1:3-6).

It’s a difficult message to come to terms with, given the unreachable standards doled out by the media and our culture.  Even most churches, though they don’t realize it, sometimes make people feel as if they have to change themselves before God will find them acceptable or like them for who they are.

Our mission, should we choose to accept it, is to believe that the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit like, love, and include us in their fellowship (through Jesus Christ), and that we are perfect, even in the midst of what we think are imperfections.   As we embrace whom we have been created to be, we gladly extend that same acceptance to others.  Like a stone dropped in a pond creates ripples outward, love that doesn’t ask for change is the kind of love that is transformational and healing.

When I hear that song by Pink, I hear the Triune God passionately saying to us all, “You don’t need to change for me.  I think you are perfect.  F*&%#n’ perfect.”

~Nan Kuhlman


photo courtesy of

12 comments so far

  1. Jeannine on

    LOVE this. Just beautiful. I’ve had the same thought – that if I think my kids are unique and amazing and so inexpressibly lovable, my feelings towards them are only a dim shadow of God’s feelings towards them as individuals. And then I know they are going to be ok.

    • Nan Kuhlman on


      Thanks for your comment. I like your phrase “(our) feelings towards them are only a dim shadow of God’s feelings towards them as individuals.” We forget that our passion for our loved ones is only a mere fraction of what the Triune God feels for us (and them).


  2. alice scott ferguson on

    totally wonderful Nan..have shared it all the way across the Atlantic and back…thanks

    • Nan Kuhlman on


      I appreciate your comment. Sharing it across the Atlantic…this reminds me that we are human beings first (before our respective nationalities) and that our need for love and acceptance (from the Father, Son, and Spirit, as well as other people) is universal.


  3. Kimberly on

    I have thought the same about those lyrics. In fact, several songs by the same artist have struck my heart cords!! Thank you so much for framing the picture of our wonderful Triune God so beautifully.

    • Nan Kuhlman on


      So I guess I’m not nuts for hearing God’s voice in a Pink song?! I love to see “Jesus coming up through the cracks” in our culture, and I’m glad I’m not the only one!


  4. steve sell on

    Wow Nan, Impessive I like this song as well! I believe she is singing about the social pressures that are put on us to be perfect. Churches and religion can do this as well. Pink is just saying that she is tired of trying to be perfect by societies standards. She is saying F**CK Perfect and like who you are!

    I like what you said!

    Thanks for sharing

  5. Nan Kuhlman on


    I’m glad the song and post resonate with you, too. I think far too often, shame and guilt try to stifle the love song that the Triune God is constantly singing over us. If we listen, we will hear it coming from the most unexpected places.


  6. John Stonecypher on

    Nan, this article is F*&%#n’ perfect.

  7. Jerome Ellard on

    I sent this to my daughter who is struggling with many things. Please pray for Erin. Thank you.

    • Nan Kuhlman on


      Thanks for your note. I’ll be sure to remember Erin.


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