Trinity and Humanity

This is a picture of my father-in-law and mother-in-law, George and Joan Kuhlman, taken around 1958 when they were in their 20s.   George passed away in December 2009, and Joan is now in the latter stages of Alzheimer’s disease.

Shortly after George’s funeral, I had to take Joan to the Social Security office to register her for widow’s benefits.  After we were finished and I was taking her back to the assisted living facility, she said, “And he was such a young guy,” shaking her head sadly.

“Are you talking about George?” I asked.  She nodded her head yes.  “Well, he was 77,” I reminded her.  She shrugged her shoulders and looked out the car window.  Although at first I thought her comment was due to her affliction with Alzheimer’s, I realized later that what she said was true.

Her comment struck me because after 50 years of marriage, her memory of George was as a young man.  She didn’t see how he had aged, and how age made it almost impossible for him to walk. She saw him as he truly was at his most vibrant and happy self, unencumbered by the effects of aging.

I can now understand how my mother-in-law would think of her 77-year-old husband as “just a young guy.”  I know that after only 25 years of marriage, I still remember my husband as he looked on our wedding day.  Fortunately, he still sees me as I was 25 years ago, too.

This is a gift, I believe, that the Triune God shares with us in any long-term relationship we have on earth, whether it is marriage, family, or friendship.  The Father, Son, and Spirit see us at our best, most vibrant selves, and the aging process of our bodies does nothing to diminish our value in their sight.

This makes me think of the story of Samuel and his search for the man God had chosen to replace Saul as king of Israel.  Samuel took one look at Jesse’s oldest son, Eliab, and thought he was the one.  But God had a different idea:

            “Looks aren’t everything.  Don’t be impressed with his looks and stature.  I’ve already eliminated him.  God judges persons differently than humans do.  Men and women look at the face; God looks into the heart” (The Message, I Samuel 16:7).

The Triune God sees us at our deepest and most authentic and shares this ability with those people who choose to be a part of our life’s journey for the long haul.  The Father, Son, and Spirit know us on the inside, and any change that occurs on the outside is inconsequential to who we are at our core.  That is why my mother-in-law referred to her late 77-year-old husband as a “young guy.”  When we are committed to a relationship, we are blessed with the Triune God’s ability to look into another’s heart and truly see them for who they are.

                        ~by Nan Kuhlman